Mad River Behavioral Health

Why Do Kids Start Smoking; and other unhealthy, self-destructive behaviors? What can parents do?  How to develop a constructive parenting plan that will reduce the risk? Why does it matter? "Isn't risky behavior during adolescence normal?"  "I did it and I'm fine, what's the big deal?" Ingesting, inhaling, injecting drugs and alcohol can impact brain development during the adolescent years, a time of rapid brain growth. Even small differences in neurological development can cause lasting problems well into adulthood.   "Altered brain development due to exposure of neurotoxins during adolescence, particularly alcohol, could set the stage for cognitive problems into adulthood, conferring functional consequences throughout life."(3) It is best if the brain is well protected from birth until age 25.  Drugs, alcohol, tobacco (other*) all pose significant risks to healthy brain development. Below is a list of risk factors for smoking cigare...

Rule #1 Believe that “children do well if they can.”  If they aren’t doing well, wonder why that is - what is interfering.  Establish realistic expectations that the child is, in reality, capable of achieving.  Expecting something more than what the child can actually achieve is highly likely to result in failure, increased behavioral difficulties, and to foster a sense of ineffectiveness, helplessness, and worthlessness. Implementation Dip.  When you begin a new intervention .. expect things to get worse first.   It all works best if the process is entered into collaboratively -- with parent and child / teacher and child in agreement.  Let child know what is changing before beginning If you change your approach / style and they don't know why, it can make kids anxious and defensive.  Visualize Success.  What will success look like?   What are you trying to accomplish? What is your purpose? What are your short, mid-r...

Draft The “No” Word  As many parents have pointed out, the word "no" can create an avalanche of horribly cascading dysregulation, and not just among toddlers.  A toddler's tantrum can be taxing, although sometimes cute, but a toddler's tantrum is never as difficult or as dangerous as the tantrum 'tweens and teens can throw.  A 'tween's tantrum can become a property destroying rampage; and anything a tween can do, a teen can double-down on.     Note: All of these blog posts are based on case compilations involving 100s of children and families that I've worked with over the years.    Mom of an 11 year old: My son can go from zero to tantrum in the blink of an eye.   me: What's the trigger?    Mom: When he hears the word "no".   me: What's the tantrum look like?   Mom: Oh, it's hell on wheels.  He swears, tips over furniture, breaks things, threatens me, slams doors, punches holes in his...

No, not swear words. There are certain words we use to describe children and their behavior that are counter-productive; one of the most destructive of which is the word "manipulative". Bad words!  Bad!  Words matter.  To keep one's head straight, it's important to think about and describe behaviors in a constructive manner that makes success more likely.   Using the wrong words makes success less likely. Have you ever had a phone call from someone trying to sell you something, during which you felt like you were being manipulated? If yes, what did you do?   I hang up, cut the call  off   . Bam!  Discussion over. Problem solved. As parents and mental health professionals, the last thing we ever want to do during our work with a child is to "hang up on them".  We can take breaks , this is sensible, but we never want to cut the conversation off.   Try this.  Re-conceptualize "manipulative" behavio...

 All rights reserved by  Alex-de-Haas Flip negative behaviors into their positive opposites; maladaptive behaviors into their adaptive opposites. Example: "tantrum" is flipped into "using words".  Children at times use tantrums to get needs met.  This is a negative, maladaptive skill. The positive, adaptive opposite skill is to use words to get needs met. As we move forward we will begin to focus our attention on enhancing skills and abilities, the capacity to manage in and navigate a complex world. Whenever we encounter a problem or concern we will begin the work of "flipping" the negative behavior into its positive opposite behavior or skill. From here, we will teach, coach, and encourage the use of the positive behavior or skill in the difficult situation. Difficult situations require adaptive skills in order to navigate successfully. Skills require a lot of practice to master.  Please keep in mind that all children ... will learn th...