Mad River Behavioral Health

Only through the full and unconditional love and acceptance of each of our children, exactly as they are at any given time, complete with their full array of human flaws, can we even begin to lovingly and gently guide and support them in developing the skills and abilities they will require to become the successful adults we all hope they will become.  Kenneth H. Little, MA  603-726-1006 KenLittle-NH.org

Win-win or no deal is borrowed from Stephen R. Covey's 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. This is a fantastic resource that I strongly recommend. I've incorporated Covey's idea into the collaborative process developed by Ross W. Greene and described in The Explosive Child , another resource I strongly recommend. More about Dr. Greene's approach can be found at his " Lives in the Balance " web site. I strongly encourage you to study these resources thoroughly. Think Win-Win, Whenever Possible We are working toward a parent-child collaborative process; outcomes that are mutually agreeable are preferred whenever possible. Win-lose and lose-win outcomes are not sustainable solutions.  These types of inequitable outcomes will contribute to growing mistrust and resentment; increasing frustration, anger, hostility — ever acting-out behavior. Avoid Win-Lose and Lose-Win outcomes as much as possible. Remember “No Deal”. Rather than accept a win-lose or l...

When you arrive home from work ... your family should be happy to see you. Contemplate this. Part of my professional perspective has been informed by my personal parenting adventures, or more accurately - misadventures.  (Ask me about the popcorn incident some day.)  It's truly amazing what one can learn by living fully immersed within the situation one teaches about. Just briefly, my wife died when our two sons, Jake and Braden, were 4 and 5 years old.  She had been struggling with cancer for quite a while and as she became more and more debilitated, I took over more and more of what had been a beautiful shared parenting partnership. I won't go into the gruesome details, but ... my transition into single parenthood was not a fluid, seamless process.  There were some very real struggles for me as I adapted to the solo role.  Sometimes, these struggles spilled out onto the boys.  It wasn't pretty.  The first lesson I learned was how to regr...

A Sledgehammer is ...  Not ... a Behavior Change Tool. Constructive Feedback Behavioral kids and teens*, typically get absolutely inundated by crushing waves of criticism.  Pause for a moment right here.  Read this again to establish a deep empathic connection with this reality.  Imagine crushing waves of criticism inundating you every day for years and years.   Close your eyes. Breathe gently and deeply.  Imagine how it would feel. Not only do behavioral kids tend to get subjected to frequent negative feedback on their problem behaviors, but they are very typically hyper-criticized for ordinary behaviors as well. Behavioral kids tend to get scrutinized frequently, in everything they do.  Many behavioral kids know this and say it very clearly. This is extraordinarily destructive to the child and very counter-productive. Imagine for a moment, being hyper-criticized at work; moment to moment, day-in-and-day-out, for y...